Mother of 12, hoping to inspire you in your journey of juggling motherhood, schooling at home and all that life requires of us moms.
Wednesday, August 26, 2015
What I've learned from my 12 children
The Ages and the Stages From Ages 20 to 3 months
OUR JOURNEY ONE CHILD AT A TIME As a mother and I wife I have taken on many titles, I have been a working mom, a preschool mom, a soccer mom, a concession stand mom, a spend the entire day at the ball field mom, a frustrated mom, a mom who has been easily angered, a mom who shed a lot of tears, a basketball mom, a milking mom ( Yes, for all those breast feeding moms) a mom who never sleeps, a homeschool mom, even a mother in law, and a mom who simply thinks I can do everything. However, all these titles have made me a better person and the mother I am today. Are you any of those moms? Do you have many of those titles in an afternoon? I am still in several of these seasons right now in my life with 11 children still at home but I can see those days become few and far between as time goes so quickly. Cherishing those little times that I know will go so quickly and moving on to the next phase of teens. I've traded in the title "Working mom for Home Disciplining Mom, and seen the enormous lessons I have learned through my children. Many of which they will never know has made me who I am today. My first child (Devin) taught me what unconditional love is and how time can go so quickly if you don't stop to enjoy it. How a mothers heart can ache at just the sweet sound of his voice now that he is grown, and married, because I miss him so much.
And how just one leaving home can leave a void, a smile missed, a guitar solo no longer in the distance and the pure overwhelming joy a mother could only feel when he visits. Bottling every minute I get. Hoping that the next hug will hold me over till I see him again.
My second child ( Christian) taught me that even in their quiet times there are ways to get into mischief but to always strive to push your own limitation, set goals and achieve them, and in the moments you do, you know God was behind you all the way.
Of course, an older brother cherishes a playmate but that always means double trouble. And that it is possible to run a half marathon and then empty all the cupboards at home in one sitting. And that Manhood means giving his life to Christ.
My third child (Tyler) showed me I can't parent alone. More then two hands were needed and a lot of second and third breaths. That I needed the older ones to help. Everything considered round was a ball and anything tall was going to be jumped off of. Diaper changes were a wrestling match and you can no longer laugh or smile at unacceptable behavior if you wanted it to stop. Their interest can change like the wind, from fishing all hours of the day to trading in those lures for dancing shoes and several looks in the mirror. All I count as joy. And he is the sharpest dressed young man in our home.
My fourth child ( Angelina) has taught me that a mom can be more then your friend, counselor, place of safety and shelter, when you fear whats ahead. That a daughter can capture her fathers heart and melt it in minutes. That baking time can be her specialty when I'm a "Wanna be Baker" and fail miserably. After adopting three at one time you are considered a large family who is crazy enough to do so in peoples eyes. And the Lord knew what he was doing in answering prayers. And a servants heart pleases the Lord.
My fifth child ( Ashlynn) opened my eyes to six legged creatures, and the purpose God has for all of them. That learning isn't just one size fits all. Patience is key to a healthy relationship and it is possible to read a chapter book in one night. She has taught me to take a stand against those who drink while preg. and to spend my days making others aware of the affects alcohol can have on an unborn child. (A disability prior to coming into our home) That God has a purpose and he knows my hearts desire. And Parenting can be the most rewarding and yet challenging job a mother could ever do.
My sixth child (Kameron) has shown me that little boys do adore their mom when the older ones have no time left to share their day with me. And middle of the night walks in a room could mean you stepping on a sky scraper, or the Tower of Babel he built earlier that day out of legos. Bedtime prayers are still appreciated and moms lap is still a place to cuddle. That even at 12 you need mom to see your big guns, and you no longer like to be called cute. In my eyes your adorable, and forever my son.
My seventh child ( LeAnna) gave me all the tools to see I'm God Daughter, no matter my age. And princesses can be real if you just believe. Life is a fairy tale if you want it to be. Hair can have a mind of its own, and going into Walmart in your cocktail gown only means you are imagining yourself on a fashion runway, even if you are shopping with 10 of your other siblings. A painting is a masterpiece, and a masterpiece can be within a painting.
My eighth child (Jessah) took me out of my comfort zones. Showed me what pink was all about and has made me grasp the little girly moments. Seeing life through her eyes. How looking in the mirror I see me, and hoping she makes better choices then I did in my early childhood. That it is possible to loss a dozen teeth in a week and facial expressions can make a bad day turn into uncontrollable laughter. Music can sound beautiful when little fingers are at work. And Little doesn't describe how big her heart is. Her laughter is contagious.
My ninth child ( Ava) inspires me to laugh more. That a good personality wins the hearts of many, and in one 15 minute car ride alone she will fill you in on all of the day to day activities in our home without taking a breath. Humor is good medicine and you can hang with all your brothers and still be a very girly girl. And honesty comes in all sizes. Big things come in little packages. And ruby slippers can complete any wardrobe.
My tenth child (James) knows how to keep a mom on her toes. That in parenting you have to use all your five senses. Life has no limits, and little boys do think they have super powers and are fearless. Curly hair gets all the attention and a mischievous laugh makes you wonder what he is up to next. And strollers are a thing of the past. Mini vans no longer work for our Quiver full, 15 passengers are more fashionable. Tiny means adorable. And adjustable waist line in jeans is a must.
My eleventh child (Eli) melted my heart when there was a void, God seen my need and gave me life. It is possible to only have two hands and hold 7 children in them. Kisses are unnumbered, hugs are an every minute need. Labor can be slow even after 8. Sleep is for the birds, there will be time for that in eternity. There is a thing called "Over Stimulated." A pink car seat is not masculine and I will keep screaming until you get that. Fingers entangled in my hair is now a security blanket. And there a such thing as a big Harry the Henderson smile, that you can't help but to smiling back.
Last but not least #12 (Liam) happy doesn't even come close to your joyful smile.... it's beyond words. A labor can be very unpredictable even after 9. A name was hard to come by and yet God's plan is bigger then ours. Adjusting is slow at 40, but possible. My body is forever transformed and yet I gave them life. It is cheaper by a dozen. My heart aches knowing you could be last. I wish the time hadn't gone so fast. 7 boys and 5 girls later, oh, the precious milestones. Forever embedded in my heart.
I pray that my post inspires you to be the best mom you can be. Kids have a way of allowing us to see ourselves in a different light. They can tell us where our priorities are. May times I've asked and even pleaded with the Lord in regards to situations I have been in with my teens or my younger ones in their terrible twos and beyond. The Lord has always revealed that when they had things that they needed to work on, I do too. Together we can become more like Christ and center our day to day choices on what glorifies him and in the end it will and has brought us closer as a family.